Gila meroyan : A mom's worst nightmare!

Postpartum blues. The worst nightmare for all mothers! Don't think that meroyan is only for the MALAY! It happens to all women regardless of their skin color, races and religions.

Well. Reason for this post is that WHI is discussing about MEROYAN on TV. Well. All women are prone to have the postpartum depression aka meroyan after they give birth.  That's because they are in their weakest condition after such struggle to bring another being into this world.

I have to say, the best piece of advice given by the ustazah in this session is : SUAMI JANGAN BUAT PERANGAI. Because she said, it's during this time that other people (husband and other people around her) could be most insensitive to the condition of the wife. Men should realize how the wife bertarung nyawa to give him an heir. How much blood she lost during the process. How weak her body gets. Worst is, it is during this time the devil can play a good role in messing up with the mom's head. Not only that, syaitan can come out with all sorts of  'gangguan' during this time as the wife bukan dalam keadaan suci kan.  Remember, syaitan will try it's hardest to mess up your marriage all the time, because if it succeed, SYAITAN TU DAPAT NAIK PANGKAT OKEH! Serious tak tipu!

So it is only vital that a husband should be there for the wife and not leaving her alone to tend for the baby and herself. Pamper her during this time. Be gentle and loving to her.  Take over the chores. Don't shunt her aside because she smells of herbs and looks undesirable with kain batik days and nights. TELL HER YOU LOVE  HER. Show your love to her. MAKE HER HAPPY! It's only for 2 forsaken months. She has done more for you by carrying your legacy inside her body for nine months! Do you think she is not depressed having to go through such ordeal? How would you feel the situation is reversed and you were to be in her shoes?

Oh I also heard that in some cultures, husband is forbidden to keep wife company. What an oppressive culture! Some men even refuse to touch - even salam - with the mother in confinement, which I believe just heighten the stress level of the mommies. Dah penat berhempas pulas tahan sakit segala, now she's being punished for it pulak? SADIS TAK?!? What the hell la kan! I  never heard that Islam forbid husbands to be with the wives during the confinement period, or does it?

Whatever it is, husbands should JUST UNDERSTAND YOUR WIVES. Put other things aside, as she is the most important being that you need to take care of during this time. You are the sole person who can make it all better for her. Who could help her get through the period with happiness instead of sadness and depression. SHE IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY and so is the baby.

And the advice given to all women out there :  Don't think too much of the hateful things other people do unto you during this time. Think only of your baby and the happiness that he/she brings into the world. Concentrate on the baby and how complete your life is with their presence. You're the only person who can control your own 'weather' and mood. So choose to be happy! And observe your pantang rules strictly.

As for me, I was depressed too during my confinement. Very depressed. Hanya Allah yang tahu. But alhamdulillah, I didn't get the postpartum depression. And pray that I won't get one if we are to have another baby in the near future. Ameen!