Custom Search


Time-Out for your toddler

I've had some discussions with my sister earlier about disciplining our children. She use the time-out method on her son since he was about Irfan's age. I tried it on Irfan the other day when he suddenly flung this headphone on my back, because he wanted to listen to a song but it wasn't working. Yes, he will get physical at times so instead of spanking and thus setting a violence example for him, I wanted to try the time-out method.

So I put him in his room. He cried and then came out to the room I was in and so I grabbed him and put him back in the room, telling him to stay there until he stop crying. Tak tahu lah whether he understood my words or the action I took, but he stayed at that very same spot for almost a minute before he started crying out "Mama, mama, mama" in a very sad voice.

Ok, what do you think happened after that? Of course la hati ibu saya pun tersentuh and so I went to hug and told him not to repeat the same behaviour.

So after googling, this is what I found on babycenter about this method.

A time-out isn't a punishment. It's an opportunity for your child to learn how to cope with frustration and modify his behavior. While your child is in a time-out, he's on his own, so try to let him sit in solitude for a few moments.

Because toddlers find it hard to sit still, trying to make your little one stay in a certain place for a prescribed length of time may well disintegrate into a chase scene. Here's what happens: Your child runs away from his time-out spot. You catch him, then struggle to make him stay in one place. You threaten, he laughs, delighted with this new game — or cries, frustrated by the requirement. You grab, he bolts. Meanwhile, because he has a short attention span, your toddler forgets why you wanted him to sit still in the first place. Instead of helping your child regain his self-control, you find yourself in a power struggle.

For this reason, traditional time-outs won't really work until sometime between your toddler's second and third birthdays. Watch for signs that he understands what's acceptable and what's not. One clue is if he reminds you of the rules when you break them, too. For example, if he catches you doing something you normally wouldn't allow him to do — say, eating a snack on the sofa — he may say, "You're not supposed to do that, Mommy." Until your toddler shows this kind of appreciation of the need to follow rules, hold off on time-outs. Otherwise, he won't understand why he's being corrected, and you may get frustrated and abandon the strategy prematurely.

Full article here.

So, what do you think. Is 'time-out' a good method to teach your child discipline?


  1. might be. i don't know...i haven't tried it with kids but i tried it with my kitten. he knew so the moment i lift one finger, he stopped doing what he was doing.

    i mean, i'm not trying to similarise our kids and a kitten, but that theory might worked to other kids. that's why they dared to publish it kan?

  2. kdg2 org kata jgn sekat apapun aktiviti anak2 contoh klu dia sedang melompat jgn ditegah saya dpends pd situation...

    klu ssuatu benda tu melanggar tatasusila pun saya hukum gak..hehehehe

    cuma budak2 makin keras kita denda dia..makin keras dia lawan...ikut budak tu gak pnerimaan dia kan...

    ada stgh org biarkan apapun anak tu buat until dia jatuh etc...biar dia rasa sakit..

    ceh bebel lebih lak hahahahh

  3. cheryna : haaa so it works on ur kitten eh. how old is ur kitty? hehe

    sisdee : oh ya, certain ppl just biar kan. macam i takleh la, i rimas tengok. esp if buat2 benda2 yang membahayakan diri dia sendiri.

    and kalau dia violent dgn orang, contohnya dok pukul anyone of us, memang i marah. huhu. mama yang garang i ni. :-p

    tapi tu la like u said kalau guna cara keras dia pun keras. so time-out ni macam a good way to teach them manners i think?

  4. nice article.. TQ for sharing. but sometimes tak sampai hati pulak nak kurung dia lama2. huhu

    about the link, u can go to :)

  5. hi baizurah..
    tq for visiting and drop a comment in my blog
    i really agree this time-out method
    i pun selalu buat kat wafiy
    dia selalu usik adik i letak dia kat luar rumah...mmg berkesan la jugak..

  6. hanie : memang kesian, tapi macam i kena keras hati kalau nak teach him manners lah. sebab takut nanti bila tak ajar and dia buat perangai ngn orang lain, people would put the blame on me coz he's with me 24-7 kan. :-D

    tapi i remember my mum dulu pon suruh we all sit int he corner kalau buat perangai, and after a certain amount of time when we're calm, baru la she'd explain why she marah all. but it's really up to individual kan.

    mamawafiy : oh ya ka. dia tak memberontak la ek? i was glad the first time i tried pun irfan faham, cuma tersentuh bila dia dok panggil mamaaaa mamaaaa dengan suara sedih. huhu

  7. i tak tau la kan menjadi ke tak..try jugak kat afif..daddy denda die tinggal sorg2 dlm bilik then tutup lampu sebab takmo tido2..i yg tak sampai hati menengok die nangis terus amik.

  8. i dah try kat sami.. cam bese dia tersengih2 or nangis tapi xcuba carik i.. dia cuba ubah topik.. or buat bodo.. adoisshh adekah sami spt ku.. ignorance tahap dewa..

  9. farah : ah memang tak sampai hati kan kalau camtu. tapi afif tak faham lagi,kecik lagi mungkin belom sesuai kot nak time-out. tapi tak tahu lah kot2 bole di train dari kecik lagi hehe

    ely : haha sami tak heran eh kena time-out. ni kena cari cara lain nak denda nih hehe

  10. i was thinking to try this on Nazif too..rasanya kecik2 dulu my mom pernah buat, kurung kat luar rumah works la skrg buat dlm rumah cukupla kot..

  11. hmm this is good.. thanks.. setakat ni aku tak tau nak buat apa kalau marah zahraa.. well. at least you give me an idea.. thanks

  12. i've read alot about discipline ni and most experts agree that punishment (pukul, time out, fav toy kena rampas) will not 100% work or correct. yg penting tu, sebelum kena denda tu, kena explain dulu apa masalah, then biar dia tau apa action & effect. then during hukuman tu biar dia pikir masak2. then tanye balik opinion dia on the issue. tu yg dikatakan budak tak paham until they are 2+ and above...and tantrum is just a phase b4 that stage of understanding.



Blog Widget by LinkWithin